I\u2019ve changed a lot in the last 4 years both mentally and physically. I\u2019ve been put in a slew of life altering situations some for the better and others not so much. Some of the shit that I\u2019ve endured has been self-inflicted while others were so far out of my control they seemed to be suffocating me. During my change I had no clue I\u2019d adopted a very unapproachable demeanor. Not only had I begun to dress like an angry cat lady who only wore clothes with elastic waist bands I would self-sabotage any at least halfway good thing that came my way romantically.<\/p>\n
I legit had a cat she was the only being that I could stand to be around; it was frankly quite sad. I\u2019d cook elaborate meals and body an entire bottle of wine alone in one sitting. This lead to me gaining an ass-ton of weight and subsequent sadness. The sadness grew into depression and that lead to more eating.
\nThe self-sabotage is something that I have only recently came to realize. I\u2019m sure my intentions where to be protective of my heart and emotions being that I made a vow to myself to never endure another broken heart again. Anytime I\u2019d let a chick close I\u2019d have an internal breakdown and nut up. My nutting up is usually too much for them and they\u2019d fade off into the distance.<\/p>\n
Now there\u2019s someone around who is hella in to me and will call me out on my shit and I love it. I actually look like I give a fuck and that\u2019s dope. I want her around and I miss her when she isn\u2019t near. I wasn\u2019t looking for her but she was right on time. She\u2019s with all the shit that I like.
\nEeJay
\nthis song is sorta fun
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