Ok sorry for the hiatus- I honestly just didn’t have much to talk about. Until recently that is. After having an unwarranted cyber run in with a crazy ass female I thought to myself… “gay bitches are nuts!” Like even straight bitches are a little loopy on average but when it comes to lesbians its outta fucking control! In all of my past relationships, encounters, hell even dates there’s been aha moments when I’m like “this bitch is a little crazy”. If you know me you know that until recently I was just shy of bat-shit crazy my damn self. Let us talk about the different types of crazy that are commonly found in these dykey streets.
Little Miss I love you On the Second Date: this chick sees a future with you when there’s clearly none. Shes like Raven in the tv show “That’s So Raven” her visions are all mixed up. She’s in love with the idea of being in love and anyone will do. If she’s single it’s never for long. She will post a kissy face pic with a new bitch often talking about “Me and the Mrs” with no explanation as to what happened to the old gal.
Little Miss Imma have her kids call me daddy: Oh no ma’am! You have a pussy- you will be no one’s daddy, ever!
Little Miss Imma harass your ex/current : This female is insecure for one reason or another and takes it out on the ex/current chick , she is very closely related to the next little miss. Anyway, this woman will have misdirected anger and aim it towards the chick that is most likely amazing in the areas in which she isn’t. What’s most odd about this creature is more times than not she has tons going for her but she’s worried about the wrong thing. Honestly I’ve been harassed as the ex and as the current and let me tell you baby: these bitches are the worst kind!
Little Miss you can’t be friends with your exes, or females of the opposite role (stud/femme): Oh god, I’ve been guilty of this one in my past. This bitch wants to control every move you make often times it’s because in her free time she is usually doing dirt.
Little Miss Looking for a Mama- she has or had a not so great relationship with her Mother and inadvertently dates women who fit her (mom’s) basic description. The worst part about this chick is that she really is just looking for love that you can’t give her. She isn’t your child so the love won’t be what she needs. There’s another type of “LMLfaM” the chick who has such a fucked up relationship with her mother that she purposely chooses any female that looks NOTHING like her mom because in her sick, sad mind all light skinned women are fucked up cause her mama is (or whatever the issue is).
Little Miss gimme all your passcodes: Bitch please! You didn’t pay for shit over here. A lot of my friends do this, more power to them! I’m not talking to any other female but TRUST AND BELIEVE every time you do some fuck shit I am reading you from front to back via text with my girl Supe and that’s none of your business.
I could go on and on about crazy bitches after all I’m only recently delivered from that life; however, there’s really no need. I’ve come to the conclusion it’s a waste of time looking for a sane lesbian; the key is to find a chick who balances your crazy. Someone that may be a little nuts, but perhaps cashews when you are peaNUTS so y’all are just some raisins and chocolates away from a healthy snack. You feel me? That’s all I’ve got to say about that EVJ